whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
