let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
time to smoke my breakfast
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
