This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize