he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
There's always time for handjobs
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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