Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I'm too high and old for this...
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
