Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Randomize
