lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
