Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
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