could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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