It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
