I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
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