I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
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