i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
