I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Is Oprah even human
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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