It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize