If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Everything about him screamed your future.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
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