we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
someone owes me an orgasm
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
