Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Randomize