Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
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