He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
