Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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