I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Can I color on your dick again?
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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