What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
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