i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
