pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
well I can't set my house on fire every night
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
