I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
