I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
