we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
