it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
