Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Church boner. Awkwardddd
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize