he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
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