: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
