I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Randomize
