When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
