You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
