How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
