So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
And then my night got REAL pukey
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
