Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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