we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
