they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
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