the new term for farting is butt boxing.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
