I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Randomize
