Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
