She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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