get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
She bit a glass in half.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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