so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
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