I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
