I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize