Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
So much Jack, so little girl.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
