I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
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